Friday, November 7, 2008
who is to blame
My friend went on a weekend trip to DC with this guy. She knows he is extremely attracted to her. However, she told him she would go but she isn't interested in a relationship. But she has never been to DC, so she figured why not take a free trip. Dude said he was ok with that, just wanted to be in her presence. On the trip he took her shopping (we know how expensive DC and can be) and they went out dancing. As we all know he made a move for some sex the last night they were there. When she refused he got upset for a second and made reference to all the money he just spent on her. Needless to say they didn't speak the whole ride back to Atl. I told her she was wrong for going and added fuel to the fire by allowing him to spend money on her. That gave him hope. She feels, she told him there would be nothing and if he choose to spend money that's on him. What do you think?
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12 comments:
She shouldn't have gone and he shouldn't have thought he could win her over. Why don't people listen to each other?? He would've saved himself some money .. I would rather go on a trip with someone that I want to be with than with someone I have to keep my guard up with ..
I don't think it was anything wrong with her going on the trip. But at the same time she knew that he was trying to win her over. But just because he spent the money why did he feel like he needed to get sex. I mean it wasn't like he was asking for a relationship after he did all that it was more like he was trying to buy some ass.
Nothing wrong with her going on the trip, but with her knowing that he was attracted to her, she should not have let him spend that much money on her. Dinner, dancing, drinks...cool, but when you let someone buy you personal items you are moving into the area where he is thinking he is making headway on getting into a relationship. She knew his motives for buying her stuff, so you can't say she didn't know.
LMAO Goldenstar .. you are so right. He is obviously not a good business man bc he failed to get a return on his investment :)
I agree w/sts, goldenstar and easy rider...on different parts.
I'm glad ole girl was up front but...
On the other hand, I do think that I know if a man is really digging me but I'm not feeling him like that...there's no way I'm going to go on a trip with him, especially when I don't even wanna date him much locally. So, I don't think it was the best judgement call for her to make.
And you definately don't let some dude by you personal things and know you not feeling him.
In conclusion, he was a dummy for going all out like that...and she enjoyed every last minute of what his money could buy...cuz she ain't turn down nuttin but the sex.
She should not have went on that freaking trip!
And she should not have allowed him to buy her things.....She good and well what was going on!
Did she really think it was cool for him to do all these things...Nope! You already know she was thinking "well that's on him if I already told him I wasn't interested" But she is wrong because she knew he was trying to be more than a friend. Just be straight up. As soon as he started to do all that I would have recapped that we are not going past friendship and not to expect anything more than that. Don't take gifts from anyone you know wants more that your friendship...You are giving mixed signals!!!
SCANDALOUS HONEY JUST SCANDALOUS
Preach Conronda ..
Going on the trip with him would've been cool I don't think she is wrong for going. However, I don't think she should've allowed him to buy her stuff when she knows she wasn't feeling him like that. So she basically just used him and that sucks but hopefully she had a good time and got some fly stuff.
I agree with you Conronda and she should have better morals. If you know someone is interested and you take the gifts. Then you are wrong, straight wrg. When a man does this he is considered a dog. Eventhough she told him, when she saw he was interested at that point she was suppose to refuse. But she is like a wall street exec GREEDY. When she refused the booty he should have bounced and left her to figure out how to get home.
Now Dakim
I would not leave anyone stranded!
Easy...expectation is the blame. The expectation of what could happen if I give her what I know she wants or what would make me become appealing, and the expectation I can take the trip and not have to pay for anything and may end up getting more out of it (selfishly) then staying in Atlanta.
They are both wrong. The intent to begin with was not sound. Thus the reason, men play the money thing, and woman play the cat game. Its a trade off. This would be a great round table and open forum for discussion. As a man, I would say it wrong, but at the same time one of many games I have played...successful and minimal loss. For women, we encourage the statement, 'use what you got to get what you want' Please believe this includes appeal..visual, physical, and mental.
Demick
It pretty much sounds like you are saying they were using each other in a indirect way
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